not even a blue-print //

I stand at the brink of the shore and I look across the vast ocean and wonder...I wonder what purpose was this journey...why did I have to be the one to walk it...and why did I have to be the one to walk away...// All I ever wanted was truth. I came to the city with little expectation...just a girl who wanted to make a better life for herself...work hard...and be successful. In the midst of that experience...there were many lessons learned...both personally and professionally that I will forever carry with me. If I could sum up the last five years in a sentence it would be this: Without hardship there can be no vicotry. All I desire at this point is a victorious miracle...a miracle that only He can give me. I don't have clue what it looks like, where it comes from, or even where it's leading me. For the first time ever: I don't have plan...I don't even have a blue print to a plan. I have hopes and dreams that I would love to see come to past in my lifetime...and all I can say in this moment: is everything is HIS. Whatever He wants He can have and whatever He wants to do He can do. I am fully surrendered to a God who will fulfill his purpose for me. I have so many questions that are left unanswered. I am learning that it's ok - I just have to have faith and that one day those answers will be revealed. I don't know why He chose me and moved mountains to even get me here...but He did...I don't know why He chose me to walk thru these experiences of trials...but He knows... and I really don't understand why on earth I have to be the one to walk away...but He understands...//

fighting with hope //

Everyday is a new day, bringing forth new battles to face, and new hopes to embrace. I am reminded that we all face battles in our day to day worlds. It's how we fight that strengthens our inner core and brings forth a royal victory. Before every battle we have to past tests and often times this tests are reflective of the battle that is ahead. When we look back on our lives and the tests that we clearly passed, we often realize that this was us being trained...trained to fight the good fight...to fight the battle of the future. How we handle our test in that moment, absolutely reflects how we will fight the battle in the future. I am reminded of Joshua. Joshua walked seven times around Jericho, praying that those walls would fall...if he had only walked around Jericho six times, he would not have seen the faithfulness of God. We often times forfiet our own miracle because we don't pray it through. We must be faithful to see His faithfulness. I am learning that there are battles that truly don't matter and others that absolutely, without a doubt do. They are apart of building our character to be a Christ- like image of who HE is and His unwavering love. I have learned that these battles that matter, cause us to throw caution to the wind, and stand silently in prayer. It's to build us to be men and women of prayer. He uses our weakness to allow His strength to shine. It all comes down to fighting with hope, knowing that if we fail, He is still faithful and still loves us. The victory is His...and He wants all the glory. He will fight for you...and on your behalf...He will make all things new-The noon day sun will appear and His glory will shine for all to see. Even when God tells the wind to blow...it obeys...//

His Light //

His light shines on darkened nights- His light illuminates through the struggle of faith- His light exudes hope when doubt creeps in- His light justifies the truth when we are betrayed- His light brightens when we forgive- His light strengthens when we love- In recent weeks it has been my prayer that His light be shown brightly in my life, no matter what circumstances or struggles that I face in this world. I just want to be a vessel of His light regarding the decisions that I make to shine His grace- There's nothing greater than I want than to sit at the feet of Jesus and to feel His light shine upon my soul- His light shines upon me daily on this earth, and the blessings of His love, grace, and mercy give me hope that this is just my temporary home- May I reflect nothing less in this world than the light that comes from His soul- though I fail daily in this life at shining His light fully- it is my hope that when the light dims- His favor will shine forth brighter in my life- May my responses to the flickering light of the souls who need Him most- reflect nothing less than His love- To the ones who have left footprints of His grace upon my heart - in both hardship and hope - may His light reflect peace and strength- and that when betrayed - His light would shine as a reflection of His courage and His truth-

-- the beauty of prayer --

Have you ever prayed for a life moment...the type where you are spun around...and the prayers that you had prayed...are being answered. It's as if you were wathcing a miracle unfold...without even being the writer or the author of those moments. They are raw moments...the moments that you live for...the ones that you often hope don't have to end...but then reality happens...kicks in...and overtakes those moments. I can remember a few years ago being awoken from a deep sleep and God asking me to pray for someone...//...I hadn't met this person...but I knew that God had asked me to pray for them. I knew that it was not only a defining moment in my prayer walk with the Lord, but a moment that I knew I had to obey. I was frustrated and annoyed with being awoken at that 3am hour and out of obedience I prayed some simple prayer. I had no idea that this person would actually exist and actually become a friend. Years passed on...and faith grew...but I never forgot the moment where God woke me that night...from my deep sleep...and entrusted me with the simple prayer. He chose me in that moment for some reason...I will never understand...maybe it was because I would be obedient...and maybe it was because He had some grander plan. I don't often question why God asks me to pray for people...but I did that night...and I still do today. In recent months, I have prayed specific prayers for people...and have watched those moments happen...prayers answered...// It's the beauty of seeing those prayers answered...that the Lord spurs on my faith...to know what He can do for one...He can do for another. I myself this year...prayed specific prayers for specific things...and they happened...it's the beauty of faith...the beauty of His work...the beauty of His character...and the beauty of prayer...// When a prayer is prayed...we are sending messages to the Lord...for the desires of others...desires for ourselves...that hopes and dreams would come true...and that ultimately His destiny for our lives would be known. That clarity would be captured in times of despair, that His grace would be given, and His mercies made new. That hope wouldn't be shattered...but spring forth truth. That life would be well lived and health would be renewed. That strength would come from His love...and that we would soar like the eagles. That in this barren land He would teach us how to live and shine. That He would give us faith for what is unseen. That He would give us joy for better days. That He would allow His character and love to flow from our lives. It makes my heart happy to pray prayers...but it makes my heart smile and joyful when they are answered. What a moment of faith...even if it's as small as mustard seed...that one should pray...for even that prayer will be answered...// Never underestimate the power of prayer...//

- Perfection -

2 Samuel 22:31-33 *** As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him. For who is God besides the Lord? And who is the Rock except our God? It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. *** No matter what challenges cross our paths...He is there...making the paths of life straight! He is fighting on our behalf...striving for us to be victorious! His ways are PERFECT and shine bright in the darkest of times...// His plans are something beautiful- in which only He could design! He has no flaw- and His love is made PERFECT in OUR weakness! Embrace His Perfection // Allow Him to Fight // Lean into the Dark // Take up your Shield // Shine the Light // Be Victorious // Give Him the Glory //

-- YOU --

You shine when no one else sees... You grasp light when the dark closes in... You are the ray of hope that pierces the soul...// You are strength when I am weak... You are found when I am lost... You are the grace that floods the soul...// You are the rescuer when I am in trouble... You are the deliverer when I need to surrender... You are the mercy that captures the soul...// You give clarity when questioned... You give favor when it's undeserved... You give unconditional love to the soul...// You allow the soul to shine... You allow the heart to heal... You allow the battle to be won...//

** Pure Joy **

Memories and moments of peace flood my soul and cause me to want to stop time. I wish I could stop time...and freeze it! What I wouldn't give to bottle it up and hold it close til it should be released. I am reminded that God has a purpose and time for all things and all situations. In the midst of a long week, I was reminded of the true meaning of God's timing and how He uses time to protect us. I was also reminded of what it is to have true joy for another person. You know the type of JOY that you wanna bottle up and release when you have a bad day. It's a JOY that has only been granted thru the Lord's peace. There are seasons of JOY...PURE JOY...JOY that the Lord presents as a gift so that we can truly experience His grace. Often times prior to a season of JOY, we go thru valley's where we struggle, and where a battle rages between what is good and what is right...// We have to be diligent thru the valley to see the season of PURE JOY! In the valley there are times to remain still and to be ever present with the Lord...to see His beauty...to feel His love...to know His heart...to hear His voice..and to feel His grace and mercy within the soul. To feel PURE JOY...is a gift...the gift of knowing that once you have endured time and allowed His Spirit to protect and guide...He will allow you to shine. Every day there is the PURE JOY...of knowing that I serve a God who makes my JOY complete! He may give me times of trouble, frustration, and hardships...but it's not to steal my JOY...but to make my JOY stronger and to purify my soul. ** May you find PURE JOY in the memories and moments of peace that flood the soul **