fade into white

Confused, dazed, slightly perplexed, and feeling all melancholy like. Thinking my thoughts are swarming in my head and hoping that they land in a perfect coherent arrangement. I want the daisies to make the new day shine. I want the soul to inspire my heart to believe. I want the sparkle to light up the dark sky. I want the simple nature of life to find me at peace and not in a chaotic state. I want the bubbles to float all the way up to the sky and not go POP. I want to create the life that I am meant to live. I don't want a give up on the dream that I am living this life for a greater purpose...and it takes many of faults to get one to where they really want to be. I want the new day to be grand. I want the light to be golden, and the shades of gray... fade into white. I want to see beauty like never before...and to embrace the the hope of the star. It's the holiday cheer and the magic in the air that makes this season bright.

sharing peace

It's been rough day...one that could be forgotten in my book...but I also have to embrace the situation and try to make it better. I miss when things were simple...when life seemed like a bubble that floated to a perfect tune. Sometimes, I go in trance and drive in the jeep thinking about how I wish I was on island...with a perfect beach...and could go for a boat ride everyday. Other days I wish my jeep could take me to Paris...and I could escape to a cafe, and drink a fresh french pressed coffee. It would be bliss. Then there are the moments where I wish that I could sit in my adirondack chair on a balcony by the shore and read, with the sound of the waves crashing on the shore. That would be grand. So I asked myself today....where would like my jeep to take me. My answer was somewhere not here...just a moment to escape to be by myself and see the light of the day from another perspective. Immediately in my mind and heart, I knew I was wanting to not embrace the trials of the day, and trust that they would turn out ok. It's gotten harder the last few years to just be content...at peace...with all that life encompasses. My melancholy personality kicks in often leaving me questioning and praying for contentedness. When it is I, that has the peace locked in my soul...and is not releasing it into my heart. I wonder when a real vacation will come...you know the type that you don't have to plan in your head, and the one that you can really live. I am learning everyday, how to accept the pressures of this life...and look at them as blessings. It is so hard to think that amidst the trials, lies blessing, hope, healing, and peace. If I have learned anything on this journey, and through the desserts of my life...it has been that in life we may have trouble, and yes it make strike us from every side and leave every chord broken. There is something greater, that comes along and picks up...and allows us to see that the simple can be found through the chaos. It's in the blessing of a new day. It's the hope that life will get better,that dreams will be granted, and promises will be fulfilled. There is healing in the storm, and surrounds it's light in the dark. Healing allows the spirit to feel again, for the hope to be restored. Lastly, there is peace... and with peace comes the satisfaction that life can be embraced fully. It's been a journey...and marked by many storms...there have been rainbows, and dark clouds...and days where the sun has shown. However, everyday that is embraced is about sharing the joy of that peace so that others may find hope, healing, and the blessing of this life. So whether that is living on the ocean shore with a simple life, or living in the mountains with the trials of the chaotic life, the purpose is the same...that never changes... sharing peace -